The passing of a member of your immediate family is never easy to deal with. We all deal with grief and mourning in our own way, and some find it easier to continue with their lives than others. There is no right or wrong method; the fact is that we are all different. Where we are similar is in the fact that we will all miss this special person and will look back with fond memories of the time we spent with them.
When I am in this situation I try to go down the route of celebrating who they were as a person and to cherish each one of the special memories that I have. Thinking positively in this way is far from easy and I will often find myself crying for seemingly no reason at the most random of times. I can easily drift into a negative mood, even starting to feel sorry for myself as if I am the only person that this has ever happened to. These emotions happen but fortunately are rare and I feel like I am pretty good at stopping them quite quickly before they take hold and become the norm.
How to preserve the memories of someone who has died
One of the things that helps me in my quest to return to a positive mindset is the fact that I like to place plenty of framed photos of said relative in various rooms of my house. Seeing them at their favourite places such as the beach with a big smile on their face soon helps me to feel better.
I have a favourite feature that is hung in the conservatory which is a photo collage with fourteen apertures. The fourteen photos included images from recent holidays we had been on. The person in question was my dad and he had developed a love for travel and exploring new places in his retirement. As well as going on one holiday a year together, he also went on solo holidays. Seeing these photos of him having such a great time in all of these amazing places makes me realise just what a fantastic time we had and how lucky we were.
I have other photos showcasing events such as his wedding day, ones from different eras and ages, ones of all of the family together as my mum also passed away three years ago, photos of him and my mum attending other family weddings and christenings, and ones where they were happily enjoying a family party.
These framed photos and framed collages also help to keep those memories at the forefront of my mind, not because I’d ever forget about him or my mum, but more because I want to see their happy faces every day as doing so helps me to smile.
Losing such a close family member is extremely difficult and conjures up a range of emotions. Anything that can help during this time is most welcome.